ELLIS HOWARD

Cotton crewneck t-shirt with panther print and chez Valentino patches and denim jeans by Valentino. Vlogo Signature leather belt and loafers in shiny leather by Valentino Garavani.

Sitting opposite Liverpudlian actor Ellis Howard on a scorching summer’s day, we are warm enough from the heat, but having the opportunity to speak to an actor whose awe-inspiring talent shines this bright adds that extra level of heat under the collar. 

Ellis’s incredible performance in BBC’s groundbreaking and emotional ‘What it Feels Like for a Girl’, based on the novel by Paris Lees, has captivated audiences from all age groups and backgrounds and is set to send this young actor’s trajectory stratospheric. 

Words by Leigh Maynard and Caoimhe Clements.

Photographed by Andrew Rankin. Styled by Alton Hetariki. Grooming by Sandra Hahnel at Caren using STMNT Grooming Goods. Ellis Howard appears courtesy of Prosper PR.

X-ray cardigan by Denzil Patrick. Button-up vest by Burberry. Boxer shorts by Kent&Curwen.

Ellis’s portrayal of Byron, a young queer/trans teenager navigating the perils of youth in the 2000s, with parents who are grappling to understand him and the homophobic community he encounters at both school and on the streets, is utterly compelling, taking us on a journey of laughter and tears as we follow Byron’s journey to finding his authentic self. 5Eleven speaks to Ellis about how Byron’s story is positively impacting viewers across the country, the parallels in his life that led him to this part, and why, despite life’s adversities, there is always some semblance of hope.

Dior heritage print black cotton t-shirt, Christian Dior Couture muguet embroidery striped cotton mock-neck top and cotton twill striped bermuda shorts all by Dior Men.

Did you always know that you wanted to be an actor?

 I was gobby as a kid, I think I was just loud, and I wanted to talk, and I lived with two Sisters. I was this tiny two-year-old with two sisters, a massive dog, and both my parents, and they just wanted to shut me up, so they put me in an acting class. I think they just thought, get this kid out of here. We just felt like some semblance of silence. 

Tell us more about how you developed your craft.

When I first started attending acting class, I was eight or nine years old. Maybe. I think. It's as far back as I can remember. I played Joseph with my nativity. I was up for it; I wanted to do that, or I wanted to go into politics, but I didn't think it was a serious venture for me until I was about 14. I went to this amazing performing arts centre in Liverpool, and basically, the whole ethos of it was that if you can't pay, you don't have to pay. So, it was essentially a free arts training. I'm not being facetious; it really changed the course of my life. And I went there, and they took me seriously. I understood then that you can have a proper career in the arts. So, by the time I was 14, I thought, okay, I'm in here. I really wanna do this. I wanted to go for it, you know? Then I did the traditional drama school sort of thing.

Les Chaines necklace and royal blue harmony cabochons necklace by Goossens.

Tell us about your past projects. Was there a point where you felt like the world had discovered you? 

I performed ‘Beautiful Thing,’ Jonathan Harvey's play, which I loved, and it was a massive experience for me. And I did that when I was 15 in Liverpool, and that felt like a real moment. I got my first agent, and I started to feel like, wow ‘people, maybe are taking me seriously.’

I was really proud of ‘Help’ with Julie Coleman and Steven Graham. And I felt like that was so political, but I guess for me as a performer, I do think ‘What it Feels Like For a Girl’, this show is, by far, the biggest thing I've done. It's a thing, obviously, that I'm most proud of, and I just feel so lucky that people are wanting to speak to me about the show that I have so much love for and so much gratitude for, you know, I feel like it's a gorgeous synthesis of both my passion and then being seen for that.

Left: Striped mock-neck top by Kent&Curwen. Round box chain and Serpentine silver necklaces both by Mejuri. FF Jacquard denim shorts by Fendi. Right: Knitted crew-neck and eco-leather knot shorts by 8ON8 Studio.

When you first read the script for what it feels like for a girl, like what was it that struck you most about Byron and what made you want to play him?

The scripts are so punk. They felt like ‘This is England’ and ‘Skins’. It felt like it was real down to the fingernails. Like a working-class community, people that I knew on my estate growing up. You know, there are characters who live on the margins who very seldom get their stories told, but have so much humour and resilience, almost on a mythic level. There are such colourful characters in the community. I thought, ‘I know all of these people.’ And so, I just felt incredibly seen by it. And then I guess Byron being in the eyes and ears of that world was incredibly attractive. The show is just an odyssey. And I think when you are like an early career actor, it’s very rare that you get a chance to go on a journey like this. Paris also really inspired me. I think so often queer working-class lives are shown as harrowing and with trauma that exists but there is also with a massive hilarity to our lives and a resilience. It's defiance, you know? And politics. That is definitely what I resonated with, and I thought, I really would love to see this on screen. If I had seen this on screen when I was 15, 16, or 17, I think I would have found myself or run into who I am much sooner in my life. And so, I was excited by the idea because I felt it was dangerous. I thought ‘whoa, this feels unrestrained. I really want to be a part of it’. 

Cactus flower cardigan and knit shorts by 8ON8 Studio. Cotton socks by Pantherella. Byron suede shoes by Grenson.

It must mean a great deal to you to portray that kind of character to younger people today, to give them a clear message about being true to themselves.

I think so, but also, I think I’m so struck by is that people who've watched it are people of every single age, and it's for myriad reasons. It's people saying, ‘I used to party and rave in the late nineties, early two thousands, and I better get some more colour and vibrancy back into my life.’ I thought, ‘that's so cool’. And then also, I guess like what, what any character does, I think it helps that a true story inspires it, is that when you see someone taking the reins of their own life, it kind of demands of you or asks of you, ‘where are you not showing up in your own life?’ Where can you be more outrageous and audacious and more colourful and playful, and you know, and where are you unnecessarily taming yourself? I think the show does a great job of highlighting the dangers of living an authentic life, but I also think it is hopeful. That if you dare to live authentically, you'll find people who love you for who you are, and it’s a better feeling. That's such a powerful message.

Striped Oversized Shirt, Chambray Shorts, LV Scala Loafers all by Louis Vuitton. Cotton socks by Pantherella.

 What do you think Byron would think of the world for the LGBTQ+ community now, and how it has progressed? How do you think he would feel?

You know, it's interesting, I hear Paris speak about this a lot, which is that the culture doesn't just focus on politics, doesn't just move linearly in one direction. You know, like things that happen in the show with a trans character, I can't imagine a world in which that would happen right now. For example, in Britain, it feels like a much more precarious political time. However, in the early 2000s, I'm not sure, but I wasn't that conscious of it at that time, obviously. Paris was comparing it to today, and she said, 'You would never have seen a trans shopkeeper, doctor, lawyer, or TV presenter.' So, while we take valiant steps forward, we also take valiant steps back, and there are obviously lots of reasons to despair, as seen in the recent Supreme Court ruling, for example. 

I also think that there are many reasons to be hopeful. I mean, look at this show, Paris has just executive-created on the BBC, which has been received incredibly well. It’s the first time it has ever happened at the BBC. I think it's important, especially important for me, that trans people do not ever fall into despair and for me to keep my elbow out and think, ‘how can we keep telling stories that are hopeful, that are resilient? Hopefully, what happens is that our show does well, and more queer working-class stories are told and make it to the screen. I think culture is never one thing. You know, it's never good or bad. It's always a really grey area. That one must keep fighting inside, to build more progress, I think. 

Left: Striped mock-neck top by Kent&Curwen. Round box chain and Serpentine silver necklaces both by Mejuri. FF Jacquard denim shorts by Fendi. Right: Navy zipped jacket, white oxford shirt, silk tie and blue floral boxer shorts all by Kent&Curwen. Cotton socks by Pantherella. Suede loafers by Manolo Blahnik.

 You said you have had great feedback since the show first aired. What is some of the best feedback you have received?

 My DMs are constantly flooded by people I've never met, who have very different life experiences from mine, which is also part of the show. It's a very specific story inspired by Paris’s, but I do think it also has real, universal overtones. And so like, there are people who just message me from all around the country and beyond, and they feel seen, hopeful, and excited. I'm addicted to my phone! I re-read every single message. I feel so incredibly lucky to be a part of something that makes people feel good, both inside our community and beyond.

It really did make us cry at times, but it also felt incredibly joyful.

Yeah. I think that's the nice thing about it, isn't it? I had a mother message me recently who has a trans kid. She said it made her feel seen, like she knew how to navigate things. She said, ‘I never felt like I had language for it properly, and I felt how delicate that is and how you learn to love someone new and someone who you didn't know was going to be your child, but is your child, and that journey.’ I thought that was so gorgeous. That this piece of art is a moment for her to now connect with her daughter, with a shared language, and it just means that both of them can show up differently. I read that and it really stuck out to me.  If the show does anything, it might hopefully spark a dialogue, allowing people to sit in that discomfort, ask questions, learn, grow, and become empathetic. We could be kind, I guess, as opposed to just ostracising other people. 

Postcard print silk shirt, postcard print bermuda shorts, FF buckle leather sandals all by Fendi. Cotton socks by Pantherella.

 The show obviously explores trauma and survival, and it does it in quite a fun but also quite raw way. How did you protect yourself emotionally while portraying Byron's pain?

You put so much of yourself into it, yes, of course. But I was happy to, and I wanted to. I often feel like if I've experienced things where my life went bad, I want to show all the, the drama and the triumph that I have felt, you know, I felt so incredibly lucky that I was doing this and so I didn't want to shy away at any point. I wanted to kind of give it my all. 

 I guess we are protected by having an incredible director, and we had a first assistant named Jo Lea. I don't think first ADs ever get the credit that they deserve, but Jo Lea really protected the space, would make you laugh out loud in those club scenes with parties, and make you feel amazing.

And then in the times when you had to go so emotional, the whole set was silent, it was respectful. Other people protected me so that I could do something or go to a space that I wanted to go to. I could tap into something.

And then also once I'd done scenes, which I felt were harrowing, you are just then picked up by this group of people who love you. That's the cast and the crew. We honestly were so lucky; we built a little family down there. I always felt safe.

Left: Navy zipped jacket, white oxford shirt, silk tie and blue floral boxer shorts all by Kent&Curwen. Cotton socks by Pantherella. Suede loafers by Manolo Blahnik. Right: Cactus flower cardigan and knit shorts by 8ON8 Studio.

 Now ‘What it Feels Like for a Girl’ is out there for the world to see, what's next? What projects do you have coming up? 

 You know what, I actually don't know what I will act in next. I'm in a new chapter of my career, which is incredibly exciting. I'm aware that I've been incredibly lucky to do something which was like a passion project for many people involved. And I guess I just want to do things with people who have something to say, to care about what they're trying to put out in the world. I feel so excited that I will get to continue to do that off the back of the show. So now it's not totally set in stone what I'll do next, but I'm also writing, too. I'm writing three things. Two for Channel 4, and one more for Netflix. 

Can you tell us a little bit about them? 

One of them, my Netflix show, is like semi-autobiographical, and I'm doing that with Sid Gentle, who made Killing Eve. Not everything is completely set in stone. We are currently in development, and I'm grateful, lucky, and excited about it all. So, I guess there are loads of moving parts.

But if anything, I just can't believe that people are watching this show and getting it? And I'm excited, I don’t know what, what is going to happen next, and oftentimes for actors that is dread-inducing, you know? But for me, I can't write what will happen next, but I’m excited!

‘What it Feels Like for a Girl’ is out now on BBC iPlayer.